After getting out of bed I watched tv and timed my contractions just for fun. It was obvious I wasn’t in active labor, but something was going on. They varied from 8 to 13 minutes apart. After Zach and Lolli got up we went to the zoo. My contractions lost their consistency while we were there, despite the stern talking-to I gave the resident stork. Upon getting home from the zoo I tried to nap but the contractions were waking me up every 10 minutes or so and I got frustrated. Zach and I went to see The Hangover that evening, hoping to laugh the baby out ;) It didn’t work, but the contractions kept coming and getting a bit stronger as the hours went by.
Sunday night I didn’t get more than 45 minutes of sleep in a row. By the time 3am rolled around the contractions were waking me up every 10-20 minutes and I was getting kind of sick of it. I’m not sure how this got started, but I was singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” 1 ½ times in my head through each contraction. Focusing on that helped me a lot. I got up at 5am, showered, shaved my legs, and hung out in the living room timing contractions at 8 minutes apart until Zach and Lolli finally woke up. I napped a little bit during that time, but only in short increments.
Later that morning I saw some pink on the toilet paper when I went to the bathroom. I was so excited! I had been losing my plug for 2 weeks but it had always been clear up to this point. Shortly after that I had actual red gunk coming out – bloody show! At that point I allowed myself to hope that this could really finally be the start of my birthing time. I told Zach what was going on and to prepare himself to stop working on a moment’s notice in the next few days.
Since I couldn’t just sit around waiting without going crazy, Lolli and I went over to Katie’s to hang out. It was more apparent to her than it was to me that I was definitely in the early stages of labor. Mentally, I was prepared for this to go on for up to a week; I think she could tell I was going to be having a baby much sooner than that. While we were there I talked to my midwife on the phone, trying to get suggestions to either slow this down so I could sleep, or to speed it up so I could get it over with and then sleep. She suggested I go to her office later that afternoon. Before long Lolli was starting to get a bit concerned about me “shutting off” every 7-8 minutes, so we went home. Zach quit working and we dropped Lolli off at my grandparents.
After that we had lunch at Panera (I had a Strawberry POPPYseed Salad) and killed time wandering around Once Upon A Child and Toys R Us. I wasn’t aware, but Zach was timing my contractions at 7-8 minutes apart. Finally it was time to head to Lynda’s (our midwife). We sat and talked for a while about what I was feeling. I mentioned my concern about the lack of sleep I was getting as the birthing time got nearer and she suggested some herbs to calm my mind and body. We also discussed the pros and cons of a cervical check and sweeping my membranes. I decided to go for it. I was easily 3cm dilated and 90% effaced. The baby’s head was sitting right on the bag (no cord or fluid in between) and Lynda was able to easily and gently sweep my membranes. We hoped the prostaglandins released by this process would speed things up a bit.
After stopping by the health food store to get my relaxation herbs (the clerk assumed I was in search of blue cohosh, ha ha), we went home for a nap. The Skullcap and Rescue Remedy did calm me down, but each contraction still woke me up, so it was kind of futile. We decided to go to Best Buy to exchange my new computer in for one that actually worked because we were hoping to Skype the birth to my mom who lives in Texas. By this point my contractions were about 6-7 minutes apart and I had to laugh imagining what the other shoppers thought each time I closed my eyes and leaned on Zach, swaying and singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” 1 ½ times to get through the intensity.
Since my contractions were still pretty spread out and I was still just in early labor, we decided to go get Lolli from my grandparents instead of having her spend the night. I wanted to have one last night of just the 3 of us in our bedroom before we added a little one to the mix. However, once we got to Gma’s, Lolli insisted that she didn’t want to come home and would rather spend the night. Since I was exhausted anyway, we let her stay.
The 12 minute car ride home from Gma’s included 2 contractions that had me swearing I was NOT going back into a moving vehicle until the baby was out of me. (I do not envy those who are strong enough to wait until contractions are 2-3 minutes apart and then drive all the way to the hospital. I think I would die, LOL.) Once we got home I set up my new computer while Zach mowed the grass. This was incredibly frustrating to me because I had to stop every 5-7 minutes and take a minute-long time out. And I felt the urge to pee at the end of each contraction, so bathroom trips were distracting me as well. Finally I got sick of it and went upstairs to listen to my Hypnobabies in the birth tub while Zach cleaned the downstairs.
I was sooo comfy in the tub! I gave up singing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” and instead focused on the Hypnobabies tracks. I got super relaxed and still my contractions were coming 5 minutes apart. The best part of the tub is I could pee in there, so I did. Like, every 17 seconds, LOL. After a half hour or so I headed downstairs to tell Zach I was pretty sure this was really it and that we would be birthing a baby sometime in the next 24 or so hours.
I really wanted to play Yahtzee but sitting at the kitchen table was too uncomfortable so we set up the card table in the living room. I sat down on the birth ball to start the game but immediately had to stand back up. My back started hurting with each contraction, which I hadn’t been expecting since I knew baby was in a great position for birthing. All of a sudden my contractions were coming 3 minutes apart, so sitting and playing a game between them seemed futile. We gave up on Yahtzee and called the doula and midwife to alert them that they might be summoned later that night.
I put on the same dress that I had worn during labor with Lolli and scampered around the house trying to get comfy but wanting to do a million things at once. I was standing in front of the kitchen sink making myself a spinach salad when a strong contraction hit me and I peed all over the kitchen floor. I was mildly amused at myself (and actually proud of myself for relaxing my bottom so well, ha ha), but also annoyed since I had just been to the bathroom 2 minutes earlier. Zach tried to construct a diaper for me out of a pair of his underwear and a towel, but I kindly refused. Since I had a dress on and no undies, we decided to go for a walk outside where I could pee freely (I realize this sounds really uncivilized now, but at the time, I did not care one bit, especially since it was dark outside).
Before we could make it out the front door I changed my mind and wanted back in the tub. We headed upstairs where we stayed. The tub was again wonderful. I listened to my Hypnobabies tracks and started moaning out loud during contractions while still singing Twinkle Twinkle in my head. DH made me some hot red raspberry leaf tea when I got too cold and pressed on my back during each contraction. He tried to verbally encourage me but I found that horribly annoying for some reason. Finally we decided to call in Charity, our doula, when we realized the contractions were coming less than 3 minutes apart.
Charity arrived around 11:30 and we chatted in between contractions. I was still in the tub and she held the pillow I was burying my face in with each contraction and allowed me to really relax completely. Since this was really our first time doing this whole natural labor thing, Zach and I were unsure of when to call Lynda. During a contraction, I was 100% sure it was time to call her, but in between I felt it was too early because I literally felt perfectly normal. (This is how labor is supposed to be, and it was so awesome! None of that non-stop pain I had on Pitocin with Lolli). Then my body started wanting to push, despite me telling it not to. I was certain I wasn’t anywhere near 10cm, and this was frustrating to me because I did NOT want to swell my cervix. I was certain I hadn’t even started transition yet! We decided to call Lynda and have her come over.
During a particularly strong contraction at 1:18am I felt a popping sensation and was pretty sure my membranes had ruptured but I didn’t notice any difference in the sensations of contractions after that. Since I was in the tub, I wasn’t 100% sure and was excited for Lynda to come check me to let me know what was going on. Lynda and Terry (the birth assistant) arrived around 1:30. They scurried about bringing in and setting up all the birthing equipment. I didn’t pay much attention to any of that; I just focused on relaxing.
Soon Lynda was ready to check my blood pressure and the baby’s heartrate. Everything was normal. She tried to check my cervix but my positioning wasn’t great for it (I was on my hands and knees in the tub and she couldn’t reach). Zach was in the tub with me, so I leaned back on him and my pelvis floated to the top of the water. Lynda was better able to check me in this position and declared me 8cm but stretching to 10, and 80% effaced. While I was pissed because my body was trying to push before my cervix was all the way gone, I was also completely amazed that I was at 8cm because the “pain” had been so manageable. It was 1000 times more painful getting to 5cm on Pitocin with Lolli, so I was thrilled! Lynda put some Arnica gel on my cervix to encourage it to melt away, but said if I felt like pushing them to go ahead. She also confirmed that my bag of water was no longer intact.
Zach made phone calls to immediate family, telling them it was time to come on over. I wasn’t very nice about it when he was on the phone when a contraction came and he ended up hanging up on Grandma. Oops! I had planned to call several other friends and family members but didn’t care enough at the time to remind him to call them. It’s interesting what you think is important beforehand and then don’t care about at all during actual labor. I was irritable during this part of my labor because I had zero warning that a contraction was coming. I would feel 100% fine and relaxed and then all of a sudden WHAM! I’d be right at the peak of the pain. They subsided much more gradually but I remember vocalizing several times how pissed I was to not have time to prepare for each one.
And so I labored away, not purposely trying to push, but not fighting my body if it wanted to. I never had any very long urges to push, just short little spurts that I guess helped move the baby down. I don’t remember a whole lot about this time because I was so relaxed. I just floated in the tub, leaning on Zach and squeezing his hands with each contraction. Between contractions I was lucid and I remember laughing at my floating, gravity-defying boobs. I could hear family start to arrive but didn’t invite anyone up. It was a very calm atmosphere, with Charity, Lynda, and Terry just kind of hanging out. I remember being proud of Zach and I that we weren’t needing a whole lot of support, but also kind of feeling bad because I didn’t feel like I was being very nice to Charity since I preferred Zach’s touch over hers (which I know doulas consider this a good thing, but for some reason I felt bad about it). I remember Lynda shining a flashlight in between my legs with some contractions, checking for baby’s head I guess. I was starting to feel like the baby was never going to move down far enough if I didn’t get off my back, but I liked floating too much to make myself move.
I have no idea how much time had passed, but eventually Lynda suggested I get out of the tub and I wholeheartedly agreed. My contractions had spaced out considerably and I remember being so relaxed and hot that I felt like I was on drugs. Endorphin overload! I stood up in the tub and there were gobs of gunk coming out of me. I literally pulled ropes of it out of me before stepping out of the tub. I remember seeing stuff floating in the tub but I didn’t care to ask what it was.
I made my way to the bathroom and pushed on the toilet for a while to see if I could get the baby to move down. Someone made me some toast and I tried to nibble on it. The light was bothering me and I wanted the door closed, so Zach and I were in the pitch black bathroom all alone. I told him over and over how I was tired and the baby wasn’t ever going to come so we might as well just quit.
I had just decided to head back to the birth room when Lynda asked to check the baby’s heartbeat (she had been doing this intermittently throughout my labor but I don’t remember how often or how many times). I sat in a rocking chair while she listened (normal as always). But that rocking chair HURT so when someone suggested the birth ball, I agreed to give it a whirl. I sat on it with Zach behind me. One contraction on that thing and I was DONE. Sitting during labor just does not agree with me, I guess.
(The weirdest part of the whole labor was that towards the end, after each contraction I would feel my vagina sort of expand and contract (kind of felt like the motion a fish makes with its mouth). It’s the same thing I feel after having an orgasm, only I felt much more “open” during these. I don’t know if this had something to do with the baby’s head pushing on my g-spot or what, but it was definitely interesting.)
At this point I was so tired (not physically, but mentally) and had given up hope of ever birthing the baby. In my head I went over the pros and cons of going to the hospital and having them suck the baby out (a completely irrational thought, but it kept popping into my mind). I always ended my mentral argument by reminding myself how badly I did NOT want to be in the hospital after this baby was born. And so I decided to just lay down and take a nap (again with the irrationality…).
As I was walking across the room to the bed I was hit by a giant contraction. I dropped to my knees, buried my face in the birth ball, squeezed it into my chest as hard as I could and pushed for a good long time. Another contraction followed that one and soon I could tell the baby was really moving down. I was re-inspired and decided that I was going to skip my nap and just go ahead and birth this baby (LOL). Zach was sitting in front of me and after a few more pushes I looked up at him and managed to gasp, “If you’re going to catch this baby, you’d better get back there!”
So back there he went. Charity grabbed the video camera and was filming from in front of me and I worried she’d miss the good shots. So she moved around to the back and Terry took a few pictures. I pushed a few more times and after one long series I thought maybe the head was out, but it wasn’t. I had a long rest period after that one, and even had a few contractions without feeling the urge to push (so I didn’t). Finally my body decided to bear down like crazy and I could feel my perineum stretching. I don’t remember feeling actual burning, although I may have at the time. I remember feeling my perineum stretching very clearly and in my head I was picturing what it must’ve looked like. The weirdest part was feeling the stretching going forward and for half a second I was afraid I’d tear towards my the front, but I didn't.
Lynda asked if I wanted to touch my baby’s head and I declined. I didn’t want to let go of the birth ball and I was afraid I’d fall over if I tried to reach all the way back there. Then I heard Lynda say, “she’s being born in the sac, Lauren” and at that point I absolutely did not care (although now I think it’s awesome). I'm still not exactly sure how this happens, since my water was broke (maybe it was broken up higher? I need to ask Lynda). Zach said Poppy looked like her head was in a bag, completely covering her head and face. Lynda asked for some scissors and used them to cut the caul and remove it from Poppy’s head. The cord was around Poppy’s neck once, so Lynda moved that as well.
After that I got the urge to push again and out came the rest of the baby. It felt like something longer than a baby was coming out, I think because I felt each appendage separately. One arm, then the other; then one leg and the other. It happened very fast but I felt it all so clearly; it was amazing. I heard Lynda say something about terminal meconium and later clarified that Poppy pooped just as she was coming out – NOT in utero which I was expecting since she was born 13 days past my EDD! Poppy started to cry and we heard applause and cheers from downstairs. We checked the time - 3:50am.
Although Lynda had to help remove the sac and also remove the cord from around Poppy’s neck, Zach was able to catch the baby just like we’d hoped. I had no desire to move after she was out of me; I just kept leaning on the ball and making noises (it's true what they say about women making the same noises to get the baby OUT as they did when they were making the baby, LOL). Eventually Lynda told me to sit back and she passed the baby to me through my legs. Even though she’d been cleaned off with receiving blankets, she was so slippery! I held her and looked at her and whatnot, but I was very hyper and not feeling particularly mushy towards her (the same way I felt after Lolli was born, oddly enough. I had blamed it on the epidural, but it must just be the norm for me). I remember wanting someone else to hold her so I could get up from the floor, but of course she was still attached to me through the cord so that wouldn’t work!
After a few minutes the cord quit pulsating and Lynda clamped it. I cut it myself and Lynda emptied it into a pot. I remember hearing Lynda say I was bleeding pretty heavily so she wanted to get me to the bed to assess it further. We bundled Poppy up in a blanket and a hat and handed her off to Zach. I made my way over to the bed where Lynda checked me out and, 30 minutes after Poppy was born, I pushed out the placenta (which felt much bigger than I’d anticipated!). She examined my perineum and said I had a mild 1st degree tear that was more like a v-shaped scratch, likely from where I had stitches with Lolli. She gave me 2 options: she could put a stitch in it, or I could just literally keep my legs together for a few days and it would heal naturally. Since a stitch sounded painful and time-consuming, I opted to keep my legs together (although I still say she’ll put herself out of business with advice like that LOL). Lynda declared my bleeding to be within normal limits, so no further action was required.
I got Poppy back and she nursed for a while. Most of it was her just playing with my nipple but she latched on a few times. Then we decided to weigh her before inviting family up to meet her. Lynda got her naked and laid her on the scale. We all made guesses (I said 8lbs, 12 ounces). Lynda and Terry had a good laugh when they looked down at the scale – 9 pounds, 15 ounces! I was floored when they told me. Even though the “pushing” stage of my labor had been long, when I finally decided to just get it over with, she came out so quickly. I hadn’t imagined her to be much bigger than Lolli was, especially since I didn’t really even tear. Zach went out to the loft and yelled down to the family how much she weighed; it was hilarious to hear their responses of disbelief and shock.
Zach had one more thing to take care of before the family came up. He bundled Poppy up again and carried her out into the loft with “Circle of Life” from The Lion King playing in the background. The entire family gathered downstairs and looked up into the loft as he held Poppy up for them to see (just like Rafiki with Simba in the movie). I didn’t get to see it since I was stuck resting on the bed for the time being, but I’m sure it was absolutely hysterical (and kind of awesome at the same time).
After that we allowed the family members to come up 2 at a time and meet Poppy. Earlier in the labor I had sent a cake mix downstairs and they’d baked it, so we all ate cake to celebrate Poppy’s birth day. Someone told me the cake got done baking and the oven timer dinged just seconds before they heard Poppy’s cries coming from upstairs, which I think is so awesome. And now we finally know what Poppy was waiting on – her birth day cake!
We stayed upstairs a while longer while I chugged Gatorade and chowed down on eggs and cheese. Poppy got her newborn exam and everything checked out perfectly. Her breathing was still a bit rapid but 1 puff of air from the oxygen machine helped her out tremendously. I got a little pale and Lynda kept reminding me to take big deep breaths, which really did made me feel much better. I was still kind of hyper from the exhilaration of the birth, and had to be reminded several times to relax and breathe. About 2 1/2 hours after Poppy was born, our birth team left. Zach, Poppy and I headed downstairs where we sat and chatted with family before kicking them out so we could get some sleep.
And that is the long story of the birth of Penelope Lynn Pucillo. It was absolutely the best birth experience I could ever have hoped for and I wouldn’t change a thing (except maybe to remember to call the rest of the people I’d wanted to be here for it, especially Lolli). I am so glad we did the Hypnobabies, because I believe it’s what got me through the 3-9cm stage of labor without even realizing I was doing it! I feel much better physically after this birth than my first; probably because I had a 2nd degree tear and stitches with Lolli. The immediate post partum experience has been infinitely better than after Lolli’s hospital birth. Granted, part of that has to do with Poppy liking to sleep (Lolli hated it ha), but an even bigger factor is being able to recover in the comfort of our own home. There was no better feeling than laying down with Zach in our own bed, with Poppy in the co-sleeper next to me, just hours after the birth.
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